What is "the church"?

Let's have a poll, shall we?

The last few weeks have gotten me pondering how many different things we* mean when we say "the church." So when you think "the church," what is the first thing that comes to your mind? Which did you mean the last time you said "the church"?

1) The kingdom of God on earth, the church that will "come forth out of the wilderness of darkness and shine forth fair as the moon, clear as the sun, and terrible as an army with banners" (D&C 109:73). The Atonement, the plan of salvation, the church as it has always existed in eternity and through each dispensation from Adam to Jesus and now Monson.

2.1) The prophet, apostles, scriptures, doctrines, and revelations. The church that teaches and instructs, provides direction and truth from Heaven.

2.2) The prophet and apostles themselves. The brethren. They are imperfect, but we are assured that the Lord will not allow them to go astray.

3.1) The organizational bureaucracy that includes not only that beautiful pyramid structure MBA's get glossy-eyed about, but auxiliaries, departments, councils, quorums, and, above all, committees. The meetings, the structure, the rules, the programs, the handbooks and restrictions. The order of things. "We believe in meetings...."

3.2) Organized religion - a socioeconomic political organization that starts wars, oppresses minorities, and opposes scientific progress. (I meet enough people in Ithaca who believe this it seems necessary to include it.)

4.1) The members, imperfect though striving, around the world. "The church is not a museum for perfect people." They come from diverse backgrounds, heritages, languages, and cultures, but share a common belief in our Savior Jesus Christ and His gospel restored to earth in these latter days. The global church.

4.2) "Utah Mormons," who sadly are never mentioned by Californians, Ithacans, or 2/3 of BYU students without contempt and derision. (The 1/3 from Utah refer to "Idaho Mormons" instead in the same vein. I don't know who the saints in Pocatello mock.) In class last week, they were portrayed as: white, Republican, lots of kids, bad drivers, and jello-eating. "Mormon culture." Joy specifies "green jello and carrots with mayonnaise on the top."

4.3) The members who are not as spiritually enlightened as I am. This is the church that doesn't understand free agency as well as I do, or the role of grace and works, or my favorite hobby doctrine.

There's also one other definition, but I've never seen or heard anyone confuse this definition with the others:
0) A building, usually of brick, with a few particularly recognizable architectural styles, divided into predictable sets of rooms, where members gather for worship and social activities. ie - "The church is down the street." Visitors, it should be noted, are always welcome at the church for Sunday meetings.

These are the definitions that I could come up with. Which do you mean most often when you say "the church"? Which most recently? What other definitions have you heard? Feel free to combine them or give them percentages or any other free-form response you want. Post a comment.

What "the church" believes and teaches depends a great deal on which of these you mean. I'm thinking it might facilitate understanding if we were a bit clearer about which we mean. Personally, my first thought is some mixture of 1 and 2.

* - By we, I guess I am implicitly assuming fellow latter-day saints (ie - Mormons, members of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints). People from other faiths might well have varients on these themes or other themes altogether.

He ate WHAT now? (Hy) - updated

Our son,
the lazy eater, (always)
the picky eater, (recently)

Who refuses his favorite foods,
Who won't eat cereal unless there's fruit in it,
Who changes his mind every WEEK...

Ate Brussels Sprouts today
"Like they were going out of style."


My son loves Brussels sprouts.
This week.

Who said WHAT now? (econ)

Whoda thunk THEY said that?

"[Capitalism] has been the first to show what man's activity can bring about. It has accomplished wonders far surpassing Egyptian pyramids, Roman aqueducts and Gothic cathedrals. ... [Capitalism] ... draws all nations ... into civilization. It has ... rescued a considerable part of the population from ... idiocy ... . During its rule of scarce one hundred years, [it] has created more massive and more colossal productive forces than have all preceding generations together."
-- Karl Marx, Communist Manifesto, as quoted by Schumpeter in Capitalism, Socailism, and Democracy, p. 4.

"Of course, competition is an ideal type, like a Euclidean line or point. No one has ever seen a Euclidean line -- which has zero width and depth -- yet we all find it useful to regard many a Euclidean volume - such as a surveyor's string -- as a Euclidean line. Similarly, there is no such thing as "pure" competition. Every producer has some effect, however tiny, on the price of the product he produces. The important issue for understanding and for policy is whether this effect is significant or can properly be neglected, as the surveyer can neglect the thickness of what he calls a 'line.' The answer must, of course, depend on the problem."
-- Milton Friedman, Capitalism and Freedom, (1962) p. 120 [emphasis added].

"Organized public works, at home and abroad, may be the right cure for a chronic tendency to a deficiency of effective demand. But they are not capable of sufficiently rapid organisation (and above all cannot be reversed or undone at a later date), to be the most serviceable instrument for the prevention of the trade cycle."
-- ready for it?
-- John Maynard Keynes, six years after he wrote the General Theory which everyone is citing today in support of the bailout and massive infrastructure projects. Hat tip to Greg Mankiw. Empashis added.

And, for anyone worried that all economics has been turned on its head recently, may I recommend this fairly readable piece by future Nobel winner Daron Acemoglu. (Seriously, he's a shoo in.) I don't necessarily agree with all of his conclusions, but he does a good job pointing out some specific blind spots that need future research and some other areas that are still very valid and ought to be remembered.

One Small Step

Sunday afternoon, Joy and I were sitting comfortably on the couch planning out our week when our son decided to join us. He was standing at a chair next to the couch, let go of the chair, and took 2.5 halting steps towards us until he could grab the couch.

HYRUM WALKED!!!

And we both got to be there!!!

He has been repeating the feat (feet?) all over the house today. He took a pause for a few weeks on learning how to walk, but today it seemed to be all he wanted to do. He took two laps around his high chair (gripping the chair, admittedly) as his longest unassisted but supported walk. We cheered every time he took or tried to take a step on his own into the unknown. It's very exciting.

"Sometimes he bounces just a little too much to stay on his feet," Joy reports.

A Crushing Blow

One of Disney's cool new attractions is Turtle Talk with Crush. Crush was the dudical sea turtle from Finding Nemo. A movie-quality version of Crush appears on a large monitor and interacts with the audience. Really. Not only does he ask questions and give generic responses, but he remembers your name and refers to you by name (he called out an audience member for trying to confuse him between Jammin' Jerry and Jamaica Jim), answers your questions, and with only a few preprogrammed controls does a very impressive job. It's a great schtick.

So I got a chance to ask Crush a question and thought I'd see just how flexible this program is. The convo, where I spoke in my most fluent Turtle, went something like this:

C: So, Dudical Derrill, what's your question?
D: Do you have, like, a totally awesome recipe for, like, Turtle Soup?
... (Crush's mouth dropped open in shock for a moment while the crowd tittered. He then fled behind some rocks on the left. Peeking out, he said)
C: Duuuuuude, TELL me that you are just kidding!
D: I mean the soup that turtles eat, dude.
C: ... That would be sea water..... There's a lot of it.... Everywhere... (He's still hiding, though). So what do you eat, and DON'T say Turtle Soup.
D: Pizza.
C: That's cool. (He came back out.) When I eat the sea greens, it turns my skin a righteous green color. Does your skin turn pizza color?
(I thought about the times I've spilled pizza on myself.)
D: Sometimes.
C: (Crush thinks about that for a second). That's good. That means you're eating enough pizza.

At the end of his show, he was making a pun about avoiding an enemy/anemone, and when he had too much difficulty saying anemone correctly, said "avoid Derrill" instead. "He eats turtle soup."

It surprised me that he reacted so strongly to my question. I mean, I thought he was a more seasoned actor than that. Thyme, marjoram, bay leaf, some onion and celery..... I think I set back human/turtle relations several Pixar films.

This attraction comes highly rated. Just don't tell him I sent you.

Quotables

I've read some highly interesting passages this week that intrigued me for different reasons: an evaluation of Pres. Nixon by someone who listened to the entire White House tapes, an apostle's impression of the recent inauguration, a tongue-in-cheek assessment of Freddie and Fannie, and a call to something better.


Elder D. Todd Christofferson -- Confirm Thy Soul in Self-Control
(This one from the Friday Forum reading this week. To find out more, come join us.)
My first job out of law school was as law clerk [during the Watergate saga.] ... When President Nixon finally did produce the subpoenaed recordings of White House meetings and telephone calls, ... the judge and I listened to hour after hour of meetings between Nixon ... and others. In the course of listening in on these discussions, I became convinced that Richard Nixon had not had prior knowledge of Gordon Liddy's scheming nor John Mitchell's acquiescence in those schemes. Not long after the arrests ..., Nixon was informed of the relationship between the burglars and his reelection committee... . It was at this point, I think, feeling the expediency of helping a friend and of avoiding embarassment to his reelection campaign, if not to himself, that the president of the United States committed a criminal act... . And so, in succumbing to the pressures of the moment, he stepped off the rock of principle.


Elder M. Russel Ballard -- At the Obama Inauguration
http://www.mormontimes.com/around_church/general_authority/?id=5918
I left with a feeling that the people of America are going to unite behind this new president and his administration and that we need to pray for him. We need to exercise our prayers and help him accomplish the great objectives that he has set.


John Carney -- Fannie and Freddie: Mission Accomplished
http://clusterstock.alleyinsider.com/2009/1/fannie-and-freddie-mission-accomplished
Affordable housing has allegedly been at the heart of the mission of Fannie Mae and Freddie Mac since the government set up the mortgage entities. In the decades since, Fannie and Freddie have been attempting to help Americans become homeowners by meddling in the credit markets to create cheaper home loans. And, as it turns out, that meddling may now be closer than ever to accomplishing it's goal. ... There are now so many unsold homes on the market that home prices will likely go below historically normal levels. In short, we're getting close to a historically unprecedented level of home affordability. Fannie and Freddie played an important role in achieving this. ... Mission Accomplished.


Socrates (with some substitutions by Adam Kissel)
My friend, you are an American. Your nation is the greatest and most famous for wisdom and for strength. Aren't you ashamed to worry about money, getting as much as you can, and about prestige and status, instead of intelligence and truth and the soul, getting it to be the best it can be? You don't worry about that; you don't even think about it.
(from Plato's Apology at about 29).

Glad to be Alive

And here's one of the people to whom I owe that: Soviet Strategic Rocket Forces lieutenant colonel Stanislav Yevgrafovich Petrov. The full story is here with a hat-tip to economist Brad DeLong who got it from someone else I don't know from tnsgrl64.
To summarize, in 1983 Petrov was filling an extra shift for someone else who couldn't show up at work ... watching over the BIG RED BUTTON for the Soviets. The computer announced that the US had launched a nuclear missile at Moscow. That didn't make strategic sense to him: why only one? He guessed that it was a computer error and, despite protocls that told him to fire first and inform his superiors after, held off.

Then a second, third, fourth, and even a fifth missile showed up. Realizing that it could potentially be millions of Russian lives on the line and knowing it would definitely be millions of American lives if he gave the orders to fire, he held his ground as the rest of the officers present said he had to fire.

Seconds turned into minutes and it became clear that he was right. It turned out to be a computer error from some funky sunspots and satellites. He saved the world.

Bureaucracy being what it is, he was first praised and then censured for his actions. The above link claims he was forcably retired; Wiki indicates he always claimed otherwise. His story apparently broke in 1998 and a documentary is expected later this year.

From Wiki: "Petrov has said he does not regard himself as a hero for what he did that day. In an interview for the documentary film The Red Button and the Man Who Saved the World,^[5] Petrov says, "All that happened didn't matter to me — it was my job. I was simply doing my job, and I was the right person at the right time, that's all. My late wife for 10 years knew nothing about it. 'So what did you do?' she asked me. I did nothing.""

Wow. Another beautiful example of God putting the right person in the right place at the right time.

Hyrum's First Disney

Dada, if you're going to take forever to blog about this, let the baby have a turn, alright?

After our successful tour of Utah for Thanksgiving, Pop and Gamma (Dada's parents) invited me along to go to Disneyland in January as a Christmas present! I graciously allowed Mama and Dada to tag along.

Warning: Contents may have shifted during flight.


Turned out, Disneyland was just a convenient excuse for Pop to get me all to himself. Every morning after breakfast, he sent Mama and Dada off by themselves to explore California Adventure and Disneyland until I finished my first two naps. We had a lot of fun together. Pop knows how to make ALL KINDS of great sound effects and he has an entrancing cell phone. He's pretty cool.





On our last morning I was actually awake for breakfast time. So I got to meet some furry, plastic woodland creatures. As Pop put it, "Well, we've done our job today. We've taught him it's safe to put his hand in the mouth and nose of very large animals."



The Little Brother bear was the most entertaining of the critters who came by. He played with me and was very gentle. Some of the other critters didn't stay very long because they figured I was too young to know any of them. ... They were probably right, but I liked the little bear.





The raccoon sneaked up on me.

Mama took me dancing around the room for Follow the Leader.







For lunch one day we went to see a comedy music group at the Golden Horseshoe Review. They played real good music and goofed around a lot. I give them two binks up. I laughed and, being a baby, I cried.



Here I am exploring California Adventure on Pop's shoulders. Ride em, Grandpa!


My very first activity was talking with a giant animated sea turtle named Crush. Dad asked a very silly question, but I'll let him account for his reprehensible behavior.

My first actual ride was for Monsters, Inc. Mama had showed me the first part of it one day. I kept my eyes wide open as we went through the story. The next day we saw Winnie the Pooh - first his ride and then he came out himself! He shook my hand on the way to his photo op and I smiled. I also really enjoyed the Carousel.





On our last day we went to Mickey's house. Dada set me down on the floor and I crawled my way through the throngs straight to Mickey's piano. I stood at the piano for minutes, entertained and entranced. Then I visited Mickey's TV. Eventually we found Mickey, but his helpers took some very blurry pictures. :(


You may notice a lot of red shirts. Gamma got us all matching shirts so we knew who we belonged to. Dada won the prize for most buttons and I came in second: First Time Visit, Critter Breakfast, and Honorary Citizen of Disneyland.





Mama and I really like trains, so we rode on Casey Jr. I was in the Monkey Cage. I just gripped the bars and stared outside intently






Dada was pretty sure, given how much I like playing with him, that I would enjoy the Mad Hatter teacups. My favorite part of spinning around in them was trying to open the door to get out.




I spent some VERY late nights. Dinner didn't get started until my bedtime in West Coast Time. That's 11pm in New York! Everyone took turns walking with me at restaurants, but Dada usually took the first shift. After all, unattended babies tell tales to everyone around them, very loudly.






Thanks, Pop. I had a wonderful time.

Whaddya mean...

... I'm not getting any younger?? That's ridiculous! I'm only 30 for crying out loud. It's a number. There should not be any significant, real difference in turning over a decade. Honestly. People are just way too uptight about arbitrary cutoff points. ... And then this happens.

Among my New Year's Resolutions, I decided to make the attempt to have no more than one dessert each week. In preparation for this noble endeavor, I splurged before the New Year. On New Year's Eve I had a hearty double helping of the family chocolate pecan pie. Ohhhh, it was sooooo goooood! The next morning we headed over to our friends for some Scandinavian Aebelskivers (ball-shaped pancakes), which aren't dessert but the stuff you have them with is. After enjoying my fill, I played with their kids like I normally do: mostly picking them up and spinning them around until I get too dizzy.

At one point, I decided it would be a nice thing to lay down on the floor. When I got up, I had a conversation with my stomach that I've never had. You know how your parents always told you that if you eat too much candy, it'll make you sick? I never had that happen before. But my stomach up and says, "Dude, what are you trying to do me?? You've given me nothing but sugar and carbohydrates for the last 12 hours! Are you nuts? And on that kind of energy you expect me to play and spin around? If you keep this up, you won't keep it down."

So I knocked it off and didn't eat for the next eight hours while my stomach got back to normal (wasn't hungry).

Then last week I'm at my parents' house and I'm helping them get a new treadmill into place. At one point I picked up a little too much treadmill with too much back and not enough leg. I normally pick things up with my legs and am just fine. But I really pulled something this time. My back has been hurting me all week.

Dude. I'm getting old. ;)

For those who remember, about this time last year, I told everyone I am insane for taking on too many work projects. I predicted that my hair would start graying rapidly between work and baby. Well, here are the before and after pictures. I also had this sweet streak of bright white in my goatee, but it disappeared when I trimmed it this week. I'm actually proud of my growing gray -- makes me look more professorial compared to the freshmen. (That's why I bother mentioning something you can barely see if you squint just right.)

A Flaneur in O'Hare

Seen in the Chicago airport Children's Airport Museum:

Haikus are simple
But sometimes they don't make sense
Refrigerator


Bet you $5 you read my shirt


A father and son looking very bored together, lounging on the painted benches at identical uncomfortable angles (I tried) while father stares at his eyelids and son stares at his handheld brain numbing device.


An evil twin. Two "identical" children in identical clothes with identical haircuts, but one obeyed his parents and was nice to the other kids and the other crushed his drink, wouldn't pick up his backpack, and pushed another kid. Some might say he was acting up in order to be different from his brother, but maybe the other one was....


Some families line up their luggage in a neat, orderly line. Some are kind of spread out over the bench with sweaters, hat, and computer bag on the bench, backpack and carryon near it, stroller to the side, and ... is that a diaper I smell? Yes, it is. One father thought it was a generic pile of luggage and left his own backpack with someone else's stuff. The mother came back later to get it and shake her head at her husband.


And now, back to our nomadic existence wandering the terminals.

*(from Wiki)
The term flâneur comes from the French masculine noun flâneur – which has the basic meanings of "stroller", "lounger", "saunterer", "loafer" – which itself comes from the French verb flâner, which means "to stroll". The term is concerned with a derived meaning – that of "a person who walks the city in order to experience it", a meaning largely developed and elaborated upon by Charles Baudelaire.