Painting and Working Together

Part spring cleaning, part home repair and improvement, part insanity. We've been wanting to paint the house and I proposed that rather than planning a major offensive, we should play economist and ask what the next part is we wanted to improve. Hyrum's room (before shot). Definitely. Scratches on the white walls from about 4 different kids and their furniture.

I sketched out a schedule for us to get it done this week. If all went well, we'd be done yesterday. If not, we'd have Monday to fall back on before I leave Tuesday for a work conference in Finland. We'd mentally plan on Monday, get paint on Tuesday, clean on Wed-Thur, put the first coat on Friday evening and let it dry while we played with the Petersons, then put on the second coat Saturday and Hy wouldn't know the difference.

Nothing went according to plan.

It all worked perfectly. (after shot of the same wall)

We did minimal planning on Monday. Tuesday was exhausting and Hyrum was miserable, so we didn't get the paint. We put him to sleep in our room and cleaned his room instead. Wednesday we got the paint and supplies and I taught Hyrum to say "Where's Mommy" when we couldn't see her anymore in the store. Thur we did a little cleaning but were definitely not ready, then we had to cancel playing as Hyrum got a fever. No painting on Friday, but Joy did prep work while I watched Hyrum.

Then in one great gasp of effort, we got the entire room painted twice on Saturday, spent a few hours out of the house, and put Hyrum to sleep in his newly painted room!

You'll notice in the shots that there's not much difference between the old white (left wall) and the creamy off-white "Homestead Resort Sunwash" we chose (right wall and ceiling). It's a little yellow and we're glad it's not more yellow, though a little darker wouldn't have hurt anyone's feelings. Eventually we'll paint some musical notes and a song or two on the walls, add a border, some nice stuff like that. The real difference is that the walls are clean and the scratch marks are concealed (well, mostly, but if you go looking for them, you get what you deserve).

We're also very proud of how we worked together on this project. We have such different ways of working on things that we still find it difficult to work on the same project. Usually we break things into smaller pieces and I do my part and she does hers and we put it together and it works.

Joy has been amazed all over the place that when she turned the planning and responsibility over to me (a leap of faith since she is the more detailed planner), she also managed to not feel overwhelmed by the project, which cut down on any communicated stress between us. I in turn let her decide many of the details without complaint which helped her feel in control too. I'd rearrange what we were doing that day and she would help us figure out how to get it done. It was a very good use of our complementary skills.

And it's done and it's happy.

Joy says about the happy weekend we had, "We had a lot of time on Friday night, in memory of playing with Steve and Emilee, for our date night we played two games at the same time. I think it was just as confusing, but it was fun. We rediscovered Carcasonne and Starfarers of Catan (2 player version). I'm looking forward to playing them again."

Random Memories of Family

Oh, mystic random picture generator, what memories do you hold for us tonight while Joy is singing with a choir and Hyrum sleeps soundly?

August 24, 2004

To celebrate my birthday and the passing of my Qualifying exams, my girlfriend - the Lovely and Gracious - baked me a Q-cake (a spice cake with bananas). It was a delightful surprise and the first birthday we celebrated together.







My Aunt Virginia gave us some money for our wedding with the stipulation that we had to use it to get something that would be a long-lasting memory. So we bought this beautiful frame and a picture of the temple where we were sealed for time and eternity.








At the Trumansburg Demolition Derby ... probably around Mother's Day 2006. We sat on the front row as I experienced the carnage for the first time and were splattered with mud and dirt. We try to go every year, but I don't think any year has been as awesomely impressive as that first time. ... Aside of course from the time or two that cars caught fire.

My brother and his brand new bride walking out of the Salt Lake Temple, May 6, 2006. I was among the first to catch sight of them. For some reason, they - like we the year before - were separated from each other for quite some time after the wedding. I hung out with him for a while, then went to explain to everyone else what the hold up was, only to wait another 15 minutes. I think he was adjusting her tiara.







Steve stands dutifully while his boutonniere is adjusted. Meanwhile, Aunt Corinne examines the train. She pronounces it quite lovely and points out some of the features to Grammy until Emie decides it's time to move on.

Here I am, fighting in the trenches of the Elbonian/Swiss war.

Not really. It's the Groton fair and the sign said children of ALL ages were allowed in. So I was loud in.




Summer 2007 - One of Joy's best harvests. Almost more tomatoes than she could eat in the height of her tomato-mayonnaise sandwich phase. It was at that point that I formulated the theory that bread and salads were merely vehicles for disguised fry sauce - lots of tomatoes, lots of mayonnaise-based sauce ... fry sauce.










Hyrum briefly laid claim to Joy's temple bag as his own carry-around. Any time we left the house, he would ask for his bag and be quite upset if we couldn't find it.





Meanwhile, back at the ranch...

The Italian peacocks were disdainful of the tourists' attempts to make them show their tails.







At Christmas 2009, Hyrum delivers a present to Aunt Emilee.









Also at Christmas 2009, an updated Watson Family picture is taken. This is my edit of the base picture. We're still awaiting the final print. From left to right: the people who don't like nicknames; Pop and Gamma Boo; the Lovely and Gracious, the Permagrin Baby, and yours truly.

During that Christmas, Steve went from goatee to mustache, and I got to say, I really think it suits him and his work on Spanish lit.

Elder M. Russell Ballard

Occasionally I go back, collect the last decade or so of talks by a particular general authority of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints, and read through them to get a better sense of that particular leader's life and ministry. Each time I have done this, I find it profoundly affects my understanding of them, and hence of the gospel.

While Hyrum is sick and I watch him at home during church, I found the time to do this for Elder M. Russel Ballard, the 6th most senior apostle in his 25th year of service. He is the grandson of an earlier apostle, Melvin J. Ballard, and is descended from Hyrum Smith, Joseph's brother, for whom our Hyrum is named. He used to be a Ford dealer and businessman.

Elder Ballard served on the missionary committee for years, only to be transferred to the public relations committee. This is kind of like me telling Joy to take a break from being a mother (by which I would mean, let me have a turn playing with .. er, taking care of Hyrum) and do some housework instead. It's all the same thing - you're just working with different people.

Anyway, when Elder Ballard gets up to speak at General Conference, I prepare myself for a missionary talk. There's good reason. Oct 2001 he gave us advice on how to be better member missionaries by removing the phrases "nonmember" and "non-Mormon" from our vocabulary, to be replaced by "neighbor." Here are the next several titles: "The greatest generation of missionaries," The essential role of member missionary work," "Let our voices be heard" by sharing the gospel in all media formats, and so forth.

This means he has been surprising me nearly every conference for 5 years. What has he been talking about lately? Mostly about families. Yes, there was one talk about sharing brief statements with people who ask us for a little information about the church. But in that talk, he discussed the importance of families as part of that information. Last conference, it was about the relationships of fathers and sons. He's spoken about finding fulfillment in motherhood, about teaching our children, about learning from the generations before us... There's been a lot of family going on, actually. "What matters most is what lasts longest."

For the most part, he focuses in on practical advice to help our families be more close-knit, trusting, loving, and successful:

Sons: Trust your father, take an interest in his life, and ask for his advice.
Fathers: Listen to your sons, pray with and for them, have the "big talks."
Mothers: Recognize that the joy of motherhood comes in moments, don't overschedule yourselves or your children, but do find time for yourself. "We love you. We respect you and appreciate your influence..."
Husbands: Show appreciation for mom, counsel with her about the children, give her a "day away," be actively involved in the family.
Church leaders: don't overplan Mom, reduce the workload on families
Children: Help out without being asked, say thank you, tell Mom you love her.
Single guys: Date and court. Don't rush, but be active about it.

And what about courting his own wife? “I met her at the University of Utah ‘Hello Day Dance.’ A friend of mine thought I ought to meet her, so he tagged in to dance with her, danced over to where I was, introduced me, and I danced with her thirty seconds before I was tagged out. That was the beginning of a courtship of eleven months. She was not only beautiful, but had a sparkling personality. I knew from the beginning that I wanted to marry her, but she didn’t share the same feelings. It was a little hard convincing her. I kid her now that getting her to agree to marry me was the greatest sales job I ever did,” said Elder Ballard. That sounds remarkably familiar..... (Hat tip to 'Grandpa Bill')

I need to update my expectations.

Our Perfect Example

Two weeks ago, my brother and his wife joined us for General Conference. It's a time when members of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints (and anyone else who cares to) join together to listen to our prophet, the apostles, and other church leaders give advice and counsel inspired by the Lord.

One of the main messages this time around that was most important to me was the testimony that each of us can receive revelation. That is, God will speak to us individually for our individual problems. This revelation comes most often as feelings of comfort or peace that help confirm a course of action, or things will stand out during my scripture reading I hadn't noticed before that seem to have a bearing on what I'm praying about. They particularly emphasized that parents have a right to receive revelation to help their children - that God wants to give us direction and help. It was a beautifully comforting message, and one that Joy and I have witnessed on a number of occasions in the last month.

Another of the main themes was that we should do anything we do out of love. President Henry B. Eyring, one of our prophet's two counselors, stood out to me particularly on that topic. You can find his talk "Our Perfect Example" in print, or as a video if you scroll down a bit.

As we strive to be like Jesus, he said, we need to "pray unto the Father with all the energy of heart, that ye may be filled with this love" (Moroni 7:48). "Love is the motivating principle by which the Lord leads us along the way towards becoming like Him. ... The greatest joys and the greatest sorrows we experience are in family relationships. The joys come from putting the welfare of others above our own. That is what love is. And the sorrow comes primarily from selfishness, which is the absence of love. The ideal God holds for us is to form families in the way most likely to lead to happiness and away from sorrow."

He gave these words of counsel to couples: "Pray for the love which allows you to see the good in your companion. Pray for the love that makes weaknesses and mistakes seem small. Pray for the love to make your companion’s joy your own. Pray for the love to want to lessen the load and soften the sorrows of your companion." He also counseled about reaching out to wayward children, about how children can show love for parents, and about showing love for people not in our families.

He promised that as we would strive to be filled with love and give that love to others, we will feel the approval of Jesus and our Father more in our lives. We will have more peace and contentment in our lives.

Beautiful Scranton

We drove down to Scranton, PA, for a wedding reception this weekend. Our new official family portrait you see plastered above this. With our heartfelt congratulations to Dave and Laura, here are a couple fun snapshots we got: Lucky couple on the left, happy guests on the right.
In answer to the ... daughter who asked: 'Mother, how do you fall in love?' the wise mother had answered: 'My darling, you don't fall in love, you must keep working at it all the time.' Yes, love is like faith, it isn't something you can capture today and it will remain with you always. It must be nurtured day after day by a husband who continues to 'court' his wife after marriage by studiously trying to do the things that will make her happy. -- Harold B. Lee



We were really impressed by the decorations. The green and yellow colors went very nicely together, the tables were beautifully decorated, the backdrop of the Washington DC temple behind the buffet was great.







Love is not about looking into each others' eyes;
But it is looking toward a common horizon.







Joy: It was really well done. I couldn't think of anything that could have been done better with her reception. Laura's parents did a great job.







Love is not just an ecstasy, not just an intense feeling. It is a driving force. It is something that carries us through our life of joyful duty. – Arthur Henry King, The Abundance of the Heart, 84






Dave and Laura, you were just sealed for time and all eternity. Please speak into my bananaphone and tell us what your plans are now. "We're coming to ITHACA!"

A Prop 8 Conversation

Last year I had intended to post something regarding California's Prop 8, which defined marriage as between a man and a woman in the state constitution. I had gone door to door with my father back when it was Prop 22 that was making it a law, only to see that law enacted by the will of the people overturned by certain judges. I intended to write several, but somehow never got to it. I was rather disappointed when it was over.

But it seems that it isn't over and there is continued and ongoing debate about it. I voiced my opinion on a Facebook poll, and that started a lengthy and interesting conversation with a friend of mine that I wanted to quote here as a belated contribution. The debate is mostly about what government can and should do and about the relationship between agency, liberty, and law than about the rightness or wrongness of homosexual marraige per se or whether it is a civil rights issue. In order to distinguish between his comments and mine, I will stick a small pic of me next to my contributions. I should note that I don't necessarily agree with everything he says we agree on, and let a lot of debatable points go for the sake of brevity and staying on message.
-----------------------------------
In stating the reason I was voting No to reverse Prop 8, I wrote:


If marriage were a purely social institution, I would have no problem with extending it to everyone. It is not, however. Marriage between a man and a woman was ordained of God, and we do not have the right to change its definition. I also worry about how freedom of speech and of religion will be curtailed as any preaching that something is morally wrong will be labeled "hate speech."



He responded: take government out of the marriage issue and the problem goes away. Would a government ordained by God be in the business of restricting free agency?


Of course not. The question yours begs, though, is if the establishment and enforcement of law curtails free agency. The answer is that it does not. God sets forth laws, laws He not only enforces, but is also bound by, and that without restricting agency. In fact, laws are ESSENTIAL in order to HAVE agency in the first place because without them there is no choice.
Commandments do not restrict agency. We are free to disobey and reap the consequences. The eternal laws are already there and we can't change them. Legal immorality is still immoral.

Man's law is enforced through coercion and duress, removing agency.
HE offers a reward for obedience, and a choice.
So, it seems we agree that the US gov. isn't ordained by God. I suggest it is even in opposition to God's will and an obstacle to building the Kingdom for HIM; where agency lets men suceed or fail. We can help others make good choices without threats, violence, and cages. I do not need a law to decide to love my neighbor.

Except for one thing: in this case, that coercive power is not being used on anyone. If homosexual marriage became legalized, the coercive power of the state would be used in our schools and against churches and religious people to force them to accept as normal and permissible something they regard as sin. Right now, no one is using the force of the state to prevent people from marrying. They just say, "oh, you had a ceremony. That's nice. It doesn't count." In countries where it has been legalized, pastors have been threatened with jail for preaching against it. In this case, protecting agency against coercion means keeping the law and constitution we just passed in place.

Again, the problem is government enforcement of law. If there's no coercion, why did WE need a license to marry? I got one, under duress. Did you?
I think you'll agree that permission from the Church is more important than that from the state. Seems to me, we should be deleting marriage law, not adding more. I'd rather tell the state what they can't do, instead of my neighbor.

1) There was no duress. I wanted the benefits the law provides and happily provided evidence that Joy and I would be, and then were, properly married by someone having authority.
2) The Church itself uses the phrase "legally and lawfully" married, not "married under Church authority."
3) Yes, I would also rather tell the state what it can and cannot do rather than my neighbor. But when my neighbor rises up and wants to use the state's coercive powers against what I hold most dear, I am happy to tell the state it has the authority to say, no, you can't. The early saints tried to get the state government to protect them against their neighbors, and then the federal government against the state government. Joseph Smith lamented that he felt the Constitution was not yet perfect, in part because there was no protection for them.
This is about protecting freedoms we have. At least to me.

Y'know, let me try a different tack.

You say the problem is whether the state or US government should or should not have the authority to decide who can and cannot get married. Unfortunately, that isn't the question Prop 8 or Nullify Prop 8 asks. Whether we keep the CA Constitution as it now stands or make another ammendment to it, the state is going to decide who can and cannot get married. The world where the government does not have that authority doesn't exist in this timeline.
It is possible for a hypothetical best to stand in the way of a feasible good. I can understand trying to hold out for it, but in doing so, we prevent the good that can be done today. Next fight we can try to bring it further. But this is today's fight and today's question.

It's GOOD to the be the Dad

Thursday morning - Joy and I had had a rough night's sleep and were kind of groggy and grouchy. We decided one of the best uses of our morning would be to sit on the couch and hold each other and be friends.

Then up crawls little Hyrum. Dear, sweet, little Hyrum stands up and begins pawing at my leg. He wants to be held too! This is unusual for him, but he knows that if we're paying attention to each other, we can't be paying much to him. We pick him up.

And, oh, the friendly little happy family cuddle we had! Baby kisses all around! Have another round, Mommy! Laughing, giggling, Hyrum planted sloppy wet kiss after sloppy wet kiss on my wife's face until I dived in for a turn.

Hyrum has the funnest way of giving a kiss. He opens his mouth wide and dive bombs in on a sudden. It can be a little frightening, since he sometimes bites your nose or cheek when he does this. Usually, though, it's a slobbery tongue that greets your cheek (or lips if you aren't fast enough).

We spent a very rejuvenating 15-20 minutes together as a little, sick family, just loving each other and being happy. I like our baby. I like my wife. It's good to be the Dad.

A decided lack of schmalz

That's the chief problem with this blog recently. I've just been so eager to tell everyone how wonderful my son is that I need to remember to tell everyone how wonderful the love of my life is too! (I think those two facts are strongly correlated, myself.)

I love being married! I'm so thankful to my have my Sweetheart by my side. When we were rapidly approaching being engaged (I had told her 6 months ago I wanted to marry her but wasn't asking yet, and she was about to tell me that she still wasn't ready for me to ask but that when I did, the answer would be yes) (:D!!!!:D!!!!!:D) she handed me a wonderful card with 100 reasons that we were perfect for each other. (After she told me the Really Exciting Part, we ... went to look at engagement rings. I was in a trance most of the time! Was this really happening to ME?)

The picture on the right was taken the very first night we met. *sigh* I went home afterward to IM Mom and Dad about the lovely and gracious Joy I met, and the nickname stuck. Joy is the Lovely and Gracious.

I am amazed to discover that 1,212 days after our marriage, we have grown many times more perfect for each other. I acknowledge that this has come through sacrifice - it hasn't been easy for either of us to change, and our Family Home Evening discussions on communication always filled me with a kind of dread - but oh how sweet the fruits that continually flow from that sacrifice! and particularly from our many efforts at communication. I've been sitting back this week taking time to notice how much more smoothly everything goes because of some of our unique communication compromises.

I am so thankful for Joy when we're out being social. (Here she is at the LDSSA Opening Social. Tada!) I can deal with a lot of people when they're one large group, like an audience; and I can usually handle one-on-one conversation. But large group gatherings where people float from group to group and mingle really leave me feeling adrift. This means I'm deeply uncomfortable at most ward functions. But now I have an anchor. Whenever it gets just a little too much for me, I have a home port I can sail towards where I know I'm always welcome and invited and loved. (My old anchor was the piano. At a BYU freshman ward reunion a few years ago, several people reminisced that one of their strongest memories of our ward was me at the piano playing background music for whatever we were doing. You can imagine the mixed feelings that brought up! I like my new anchor better.)

As we are convalescing together, I'm reminded again and again how nice it is to just hold her hand, or put my arm around her. How perfectly and softly we fit together!

Joy is such a thoughtful, tender ministering angel. Her patience with me and with Hyrum, particularly on his many recent grouchy days, is inspiring.

I also truly admire her persistence and dedication. For a couple months last year she read the Book of Mormon at a rate of 10 pages a day while she walked back and forth across the apartment to get her exercise. Most recently she's been reading the BoM and Doctrine and Covenants by reading one page from each every day, and she's managed to do so every single day for so long that she finished the D&C and is now halfway through the Pearl of Great Price. Not just in religion, but in everything: if she says it, she does it. She is amazingly dependable, reliable, and dedicated.

Her love of family history work is not only infectious, it is amazing to see how brilliantly she smiles and gleams while she works on it! She has been known to disappear for hours on end if Hy and I will let her, only surfacing when I insist she eat something.

She is the most zealous yet natural missionary I've ever known. She happily talks to anyone she meets and often finds a way to bring in the gospel. It isn't something she does consciously - she doesn't think "I've got to convert this person." She just shares the good news that makes her so happy.

I particularly enjoy the delightful sound effects she makes when throwing herself at the ball during racquetball.

I love her beautiful voice and how sweetly she sings to Hyrum. How grateful I am for her attentiveness to him! (On the left is a picture of her and Hyrum enjoying the Groton parade. Above is her with her Excellent Parent trophy my parents gave her after our doctor said we were ... excellent parents.)

I am thankful most of all that she has chosen to love me, and chooses every day to find more reasons to love and better and better ways to express it. She really is the greatest strength and grace in my life. Would that I might someday be worthy of such an inestimable treasure! To think that she let's me be hers! Some might say we've been married three years, going on four. To me, one of the greatest parts of the gospel can be summed up as: 1212 days ... going on forever.

Thank you, Friend.

The Anniversary According to Hyrum

My parents are trying to find time to finish their blog post about their third anniversary. It'll probably show up as the post before this one, so watch out for it. While you're waiting, though, let me clue you in on what really happened on Day 1111 of their marriage:

11 hours of DRIVING, that's what happened. And there's me in the back seat with nothing to do. Of course I slept nearly the whole trip! It's that or listen to Dad turn on yet another CD of romantic music while they reminisce about mushy stuff and kiss at each red light. C'mon guys, get a partition! It's at least nice they'd stop every 2 hours to feed me. (Mom tells me that if we hadn't had to stop to feed me, it would have taken much less time. Stupid seat belt laws.)



So finally we get to some place called Viagara Falls, ... or something like that. I don't know what the big deal was, but Mom loved it. We went on a boat that goes right up to the falls. I drew an arrow on the picture to show you.



Of course, Dad had to get a picture of me sleeping through one of the world's natural wonders. Give a baby a break! I mean, the falls were, like, the best white noise machine ever. How was a guy supposed to stay awake?

So then Dad gets lost in rush hour traffic and heads the wrong way down the wrong freeway, and I'm starving. Meanwhile Mr. We'll-be-there-in-15-minutes-tops doesn't want to pull over to feed me in case he forgets which wrong way he turned and can't figure out which way is north with the sun setting in the west. It's not that hard, Dad.

Finally we get to the Toronto Temple. Mom and Dad take turns watching over me while the other one gets to have fun in the temple. At least, I think it must be fun in there. Dad came out looking much more alert and calm, and Mom was smiling and happy to see me again. (Note to self: she's happier when I coo than when I cry. Maybe it's me.)

Here's me at the temple. In my car seat, of course, as if I hadn't spent enough time in there. Dad did take me out for a moment and let me touch the temple, though. He says it's the House of the Lord and he hopes that someday it'll touch me too. He's corny that way. He talked to me a bit about why it's such a special place, and he hopes someday I'll be able to go inside too. That might be cool. It must be important if they drove all the way out here just for that. They've been looking forward to going for months.





Dad took me on a tour of the temple grounds while Mom was inside. There were fountains and flowers and shrubs all over the place. Here are a couple pictures of me enjoying the grounds and being with my dad.






Oh yeah, the tour also included the foyer bathroom. (Greeeat time for a picture, Dad. Sheesh. The man is incorrigible.) On the plus side, I'm one of the few people my age who can say the temple has already changed him.



We ended the evening at the Mandarin Restaurant, some fancy schmancy Chinese buffet where Dad took Mom on their first date. Now that was cool. Every one of the waiters and cooks (and they've got something like 3 dozen!) wandered in to see the cute baby, or asked Mom and Dad to open up the baby sling and show them my gorgeous 3-mo. old self. The patrons at the other tables thought I was cute too, and some of the other kids under 1 came over to play with me. Everyone thought I was adorably cute and were amazed to learn I was 3 months old today. One of the teeny little waitresses commented that she has a 2-mo. old baby girl who's 12 pounds. Then another said her 2-mo old was 15 pounds. FIFTEEN? Maybe I am still tiny....

Every room has a different theme. This is Dad trying to make me look interested in the fish. The other aquarium was better: they had a live scuba diver in there scrubbing the place during dinner. They had a bird room and a bamboo room too. I think Mom and Dad will post some pics of it.

We didn't get there until it was almost their closing time, and the buffet disappeared before Mom was all the way done. Bummer. But I think everyone had enough. Then they put me back in my car seat for the 5 hour drive home. I decided to sleep through that too. We got home about 3:30 am. Dad fed me, Mom pumped, and then we went to bed while Dad went to take a friend over to the airport at 4:30.

Well, Mom thinks it's time for me to go to bed. She says I'm sounding just a little bit cranky in this post. I'm glad they enjoyed themselves, but I'm just thankful to be home and able to wiggle and squirm all day. Hey, Dad, where's my midnight feeding, yo?!

Where Did We Go on our First Date?

Oh, Canada.

(warning Watsons unplugged after midnight read at your own risk- length subject to station identification)

Today [June 11] we had a wonderful day, date and walk down memory lane.

Part III of the Watson Family Anniversary

J: I started this day same as most getting up at 7 to pump and feed Hyrum.

D: I did not start this day as most: I woke up before 10.

J: I was a little concerned that Hyrum woke up before I started pumping, because we were hoping to leave the house by 10 am, and that required me pumping, before feeding Hyrum. However, I knew this day would be an unusually good one when I went to check on Hyrum and he was smiling and talking to me very first thing. It is usually screams of “where is my milk” first.

D: I usually sleep through that.

J: In all fairness Derrill usually takes the late feeding, so I get really good sleep before I get up with Hyrum and that is due to my wonderful husband.

D: To make a very long post shorter, we did actually get on the road by 10:10 in part because I woke up an hour before I planned on.

J: Yeah, every mothers dream that she will get more help than expected. That was beginning of a day to spoil the mother.

D: That was the goal. The spoilage began in earnest in Niagara Falls, Ontario.

J: I told Derrill that I had reeeeeally wanted to ride the boat up to the falls, so we did. Our entourage was Hyrum on a boat called the Maid of the Mist. It was really cute, they gave us each a blue plastic hoody to wear, so even Hyrum had one.

D: And he slept through it, water spraying in his face. And he slept through it!

J: I love the rocks at the bottom of the first falls, but the U shaped falls at the end are just indescribable.

D: Wet describes them pretty well. And tall.

J: It was glorious. I love the continuous motion of the falls.

D: One of the things that impressed me was the color. You had white water cascading, blue water underneath us, and green water at the tipping point of the falls and it was all the same water. You are the Waterfall Queen.

J: One of the things that Derrill and I both really like about being in upstate NY is the water and waterfalls. I also liked standing at the edge of the boat with all of the spray in my face.

D: Then we went down memory lane.

J: Our next treat was going to the Toronto temple.

D: In Brampton.

J: This trip to the temple was in commemoration of our first weekend dating. I say weekend because Derrill came to visit me, stayed at one of my friend’s homes and spent the weekend with me.

D: And being the slow, careful, shy man that I am and not wanting to give Joy any ideas, I took her to the temple. Actually she drove me, but that’s cause she had a car that was built in this century.

J: Nostalgia was really interesting remembering who I was then and now, I am so glad things turned out the way they did.

D: That first weekend I also took her bowling, to eat Chinese, and for a romantic walk through knee deep snow when we held hands for the first time. Anyway back to the story.

J: We both did some initiatory work for the dead, taking turns watching Hyrum. It was so peaceful and wonderful to be back at the temple since we have had a four month hiatus.

D: While I was walking Hyrum around the temple grounds, I really enjoyed explaining to him why the temple is important and I took him out of his car seat to let him touch the temple.

J: When I got back to the car Derrill had left a surprise on my seat.

D: So did Hyrum but I didn’t want to tell her about that one. (just kidding)

J: It was a book that I have been dieing to read and I've been making a pilgrimage to in the book store for a while. I even had been walking in the store and reading a few pages from it while I was exercising one day.

D: She didn’t tell me about her visits to Mecca. I just knew she really wanted it.

J: It is called My Dearest Friend, a compilation of letters written by Abigail and John Adams to each other.

D: It seemed a very appropriate anniversary gift.

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D: So as Hyrum told you all, we then drove to the restaurant where we went on our first date: The Mandarin. A temple worker had recommended it last time we were there, and we were not disappointed.

J: It has GREAT atmosphere and some really neat rooms. And the all you can eat buffet is really cool. Buffets, I should say.

D: There are two buffets of regular Chinese entrees, one for salad, one for bread and soup, another for a grill with more US affair, and a ... 12345 ... 6th buffet with desserts PLUS the ubiquitous ice cream cart.

J: But you gotta be careful to get there before 9:30. I'm talking about before 9.

D: They're reasonable people. They'd like to go home too. They have to clean up. At 9:30, the food disappears. GONE. And they will not call it back again.

J: Derrill and I took turns taking care of Hyrum and getting food.

D: Otherwise we both might have had our fill. Joy was still looking forward to some items she hadn't had enough of, though I was happily stuffed.

J: Our waitress was really nice, and everyone paid homage to the boy. She took a picture of us and give it to us in a little frame. My favorite is the waterfall mountain as you come in the front doors.

D: They have two adjoining rooms in an aquarium theme, two more separated rooms with a bird theme (complete with both live and stuffed birds), and another large room with bamboo displays and a running waterfall that's a good 12-15 feet high.

J: And everyone converges on the same food.

D: I particularly enjoyed their fried fish. It was some Really good fish.

J: I really liked the grilled chicken and the clam chowder soup.

D: "Hyrum" wasn't exaggerating when he said there were 3 dozen servers. There were 4 for our small room alone, plus another guy watching them to make sure everyone had enough water.

J: We kept having people stop at our table who weren't our server, and she was plenty attentive.

D: We took some time after dinner to tour the restaurant, and nearly every server, busboy, cleaning lady, Tom, Dick, and Kim asked to see the baby in our papoose. They were astounded a baby could be so easily carried, at how small he was, ... and how cute!

D: The only other remarkable thing for me was on the drive home. We very nearly ran out of gas before we found an open station on the Canadian side of the border. I did realize that the listed price was in liters, not gallons, but because it was midnight I didn't bother calculating what the gallon price actually was. I prepaid the amount I would normally have spent, and only afterwards realized that the tank was far from full. I refilled again on the NY side, thankful that the Democrats and Greens haven't upped our gas taxes another $1 yet, as they have in "Canadia."

J: It was just a great day. I was really thankful that, as at other times, the Lord has helped our baby to have a nice peaceful day so Derrill and I could spend some time together.

D: It was a very nice day with my sweetheart.